Stop Walking on Eggshells for Partners - by Randi Kreger & Bill Eddy (Paperback)

About the Book

People in romantic relationships with narcissists or those suffering from borderline personality disorder (BPD) often feel manipulated, controlled, or even abused. Partners are frequently the focus of violent and irrational rages, and may find themselves "walking on eggshells" to avoid confrontation. BPD expert Randi Kreger--author of Stop Walking on Eggshells--presents essential skills to help partners establish boundaries, communicate effectively, and make the decision to stay or leave in a safe and healthy way.

Book Synopsis

From the author of Stop Walking on Eggshells comes a lifeline for the romantic partners of those with BPD or narcissistic personality disorder. With this guide, you'll learn to set boundaries, defuse arguments, and do what's right for you.

Do you often feel manipulated, controlled, or lied to in your relationship? Does your partner exhibit intense, irrational, or violent rage? Are you often the victim of gaslighting or extreme blame? If your partner has borderline personality disorder (BPD) or narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), it's important to remember that it is not your fault. Lured in by your partner's initial charm, you might have initially ignored or outright denied the red flags; however, the constant stream of criticism, blame, and gaslighting has left you questioning your own reality. So, how can you begin to set boundaries and make self-preservation a priority?

BPD and NPD expert Randi Kreger provides targeted resources to help you build the confidence you need to navigate your relationship safely and effectively. Packed with in-depth information and proven-effective skills, this no-nonsense guide will help you evaluate your relationship, discover what you truly want and need, and gain the courage needed to make healthy decisions--and act on them. If you decide to stay with your partner, you'll be equipped with tools to improve the relationship; if you determine you want to leave and start a new life, this book will light your path to freedom.

As much as it might feel like it, you are not stuck in your current relationship. There is a way forward, and no matter how you ultimately choose to proceed, you'll be guided wisely and safely toward a satisfying relationship--and the better, more peaceful life you deserve.

Review Quotes

"Stop Walking on Eggshells for Partners reminds us that navigating these precarious and devastating relationships is a tightrope walk on barbed wire. This book provides much-needed and practical guidance and clear realities on how to manage antagonistic relationships with partners--relationships that people often cannot just 'leave.'"
--Ramani Durvasula, clinical psychologist, and New York Times bestselling author of It's Not You--Ramani Durvasula

"Empowering and enlightening, this book is a beacon of hope for those navigating toxic relationships with partners suffering from narcissistic or borderline personality disorders. It unravels the intricate web of psychological and emotional manipulation with clarity and compassion, providing solace and understanding to those who have felt silenced and invalidated. It is a vital resource for reclaiming one's sense of self and finding the strength to break free from destructive patterns. A must-read for anyone seeking to heal and thrive."
--Lisa A. Romano, best-selling author, life coach, expert in the field of codependency and narcissistic abuse, and founder of The Conscious Healing Academy--Lisa A. Romano

"If the soulmate with whom you fell in love shifts between episodes of angry rage, self-righteous stonewalling, or jealous control of your activities and then showers you with love, this book will resonate deeply. It will not only awaken you from the confusion and fear you have been living with, but also empower you to make better decisions for yourself, your relationship, and your future."
--Corrine R. Stoewsand, PhD, director of Foro Mindfulness; founding member of Fundacion Foro's clinical team providing dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) in Buenos Aires, Argentina; and author of Genuine Validation--Corrine R. Stoewsand, PhD

"So happy to discover that the authors of the Stop Walking on Eggshells series have turned their focus to include narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) since the two disorders make up so many high-conflict couples. The authors did an excellent job of defining the two disorders, discussing the similarities and the differences, helping readers discover the unmet needs that drew them to their partner, and offering them important skills to help them improve their relationship."
--Beverly Engel, LMFT, author of The Emotionally Abusive Relationship--Beverly Engel, LMFT

"This book shares helpful and abundant examples from both caretakers and their partners that give a real feel for the dynamics of these relationships. It shows ways to understand the high-conflict partner while also setting limits on their negative behaviors. And, it helps caretakers see how healing their own trauma, not buying into gaslighting, developing compassionate detachment, and not invalidating their partner can ultimately make changes in the relationship."
--Margalis Fjelstad, PhD, author of StopCaretaking the Borderline or Narcissist--Margalis Fjelstad, PhD

"This is a one-stop resource for partners! Using clear and jargon-free language, this book achieves several goals. It explains borderline and narcissistic personality disorders using modern and relevant frameworks. Secondly, it provides practical advice to deal with challenging behaviors and communication patterns. Finally, it gives readers usable suggestions to protect and care for themselves with self-understanding and knowledge."
--Daniel E. Mattila, MDiv, LCSW, schema therapist in private practice in New York, NY--Daniel E. Mattila, MDiv, LCSW

About the Author

Randi Kreger is coauthor of Stop Walking on Eggshells, and author or coauthor of three other books: The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook, The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder, and Stop Walking on Eggshells for Parents. Kreger is owner and moderator of the Moving Forward family support group, which can be accessed at her website: www.stopwalkingoneggshells.com. She has given presentations throughout the United States and in Japan. She also has a one-on-one coaching practice which can be accessed through her website.

Bill Eddy, LCSW, JD, is a family lawyer, therapist, and mediator in San Diego, CA. He is cofounder and chief innovation officer at High Conflict Institute, and trains lawyers, judges, mediators, and counselors worldwide in respectfully managing high-conflict disputes and personalities. He is author of more than twenty books and manuals, developer of the New Waysfor Families method for separation and divorce, and blogger for Psychology Today with more than six million views. His website is www.highconflictinstitute.com.